Loving yourself can be the hardest task of all. But February is the month of self-love… and we are daring you to CHOOSE SELF LOVE! We all know that loving ourselves is something we should do… we all know that you have to love yourself first before you can love another… we would all love to take care of ourselves better but find it more of a dream than a reality, but this month at Girtalk… Taking it Deeper™ we take a stand for self-love, because it is not a luxury, it is a must-have. Download this month’s printable Girltalk Guide here.

Be Real.

Could you imagine telling a child, “Hey you, don’t love yourself, that’s selfish.” Of course not. And chances are that if asked, “Do you love yourself?” most people would say, “Yes, of course I do,” when in fact the majority of us don’t really have a clue what self-love actually means, or requires. This lack of understanding about self-love isn’t surprising when you consider that the current definition of self-love on dictionary.com is ‘conceit, vanity and narcissism’ (no kidding!) Or when you look at the pressures today’s woman faces, equal to men in many ways, knowing she can do anything, but exhausted by her attempts to do and be everything.

While it is true that women and girls have more equality and self esteem that ever before, something isn’t changing. We believe that something is self-love… while self esteem is something we want every woman and girl to have, knowing that you can do anything doesn’t stop women and girls from beating themselves up, putting themselves into abusive relationships or hating and destroying their bodies.

Today, in the 21st century, these are the facts:

• 1 in 3 women will be in an abusive relationship before the age of 20. 80% will return.
• 1 in 3 women will be sexually abused.
• 4 of 5 girls will think about dieting before 4th grade.
• Almost 1 out of 2 women will suffer through a divorce. 20% in the first 5 years of marriage.
• 80% of women are so exhausted that they are headed for extreme adrenal gland fatigue.
• Women surveyed today are no happier than women surveyed in 1970, even though they have more equality, self esteem and freedom.

Be Wise.

My definition of self-love is quite different than the dictionary.com version – and it boils down to this: Do you have unconditional love and respect for yourself? A big question for sure. Self-love can feel so intangible and vast to attain, but there is a path, there are milestones – I’ve experienced at least 5 of them myself over the past 10 years. I call these milestones the gates of self-love. And you can use them to see where you have load of self love and where you don’t.

In honor of this February 13^th, the international day of self love, I’ve created The Self Love Test to give you insight on where you are ready to grow more self love by identifying the 5 gates of self-love, which ones you’ve passed and which ones you are still circling around. Brief descriptions of the gates are included in this packet, and you can get the full details as the vows and hows of self-love in the free self-love kit at www.ChooseSelfLove.com.

Be You.

My self-love dare to you is that on Feb 13^th, or any day in February, you choose one gate of self-love and make that the gate you focus on this year…and to do it with the support and insight of the women in your Girltalk circle.  You each witness each other’s commitment and support each other as the year goes on. Here’s a step-by-step guide on how to do it in your own Girltalk group:

THIS MONTH’s ADVENTURE: Take the Self Love Test and Choose How You Will Grow Your Self-Love in 2011

Step One: Do your own reflection.

Take this adventure on your own, before getting together w/ your girlfriends. Your Mission: Take the Self Love Test. For now, take this test and as you read about each gate, ask yourself, Have I already passed through to the other side, or Am I still climbing my way up to new levels of self-love here? Then ask yourself, “If I was to choose one area of self-love to grow in 2011, what would that be?” Dare to choose self-love.

The 5 Gates of Self-Love

Gate #1:  I know who I am and what I want from this life.

This is the first factor to loving yourself, because if you don’t know who you are, how can you love that person? Most of us go through life doing what we think we are supposed to do and be, influenced by the society around us. These experiences and people form our beliefs, attitudes, and perceptions, until the day we realize that how we really feel and think is different. While you will continue to learn about yourself forever, self-love requires that a. You make a choice to live self-aware, b. You know you want from your life and you are not settling for less than your heart and soul desire. c. You know who you are NOT, as well as who you are. d. You have healed your emotional gapers.

Gate #2: All of my relationships support me to be my best me and to live the life I want, or I don’t have them. This can be one of the hardest milestones, because it means setting boundaries and being honest about your relationships. It requires honoring yourself SO much that you only have relationships in your life – friendships, romantic partners, even relatives – that give respect, trust, unconditional love and truth. You love and honor yourself so deeply that all relationships in your life make your life better, help you reach your dreams and be a better you. This doesn’t mean that the relationships are perfect, void of difficulty, or that you are absolved of giving the same respect you desire. What it does require is that you choose me before we in every relationship – let go of ones that don’t serve you, change ones that have the potential to grow, and open up to let new ones come in.

Gate #3: My body is my temple. I recently took part in a survey in which 78% of women admitted that the thing they were hardest on themselves about was their body. Not a shocker, but sad.  Let’s face it, we are all guilty of body hate and what I call ‘body slavery’ – treating your body like a drive-me-til-I-drop workhorse, ignoring her needs completely. For me like I said, it was my cellulite. “Every time I sat down wearing shorts it screamed at me, ‘Here I am! Look at me!’ After being tortured by it for years, I did a self-love practice of loving my cellulite. Every day, I told it, “I love you.” I meditated daily, visualizing my cellulite pockets being filled up with love. Today, I can’t tell you if I have any less of it, but I do know that I very rarely notice it. And when I do, while I may not like my cellulite, I can love it. Its appearance now motivates me to walk more, instead of hating my body for having it. Self-love requires that when you notice something about your body you don’t like you choose love vs hate. Self-love also means shifting your relationship to your body from her being in servitude to you to you being grateful for this beautiful temple you get to inhabit while on this earth.

Gate #4: I am nice to myself. We are harder on ourselves than anyone else could ever be. In fact, if the outside world could hear the thoughts inside your head, they would call the authorities. Every woman has an Inner Mean Girl inside of her spewing out rants like,  “You are not enough. You should be able to get more done in a day. You don’t belong.” She compares your worst to everyone else’s best. Some call her the inner critic, but she is way more personal than that! As part of your self-love journey, your job is to love this Inner Mean Girl to death, so that instead of hurting you with her self-sabotaging thoughts and habits, she can help you see how beautiful, powerful and whole you are right now, just because you are you.

Gate #5:  I can and do take care of me without the guilt or burden. It’s like we have a DNA pattern that says take care of everyone else before you take care of you, and if we try to buck that pattern by actually taking care of ourselves, we can’t help but feel guilty or like we should be doing something more productive. This self-love milestone means being able to say, “Yes… I make self care a must, not a nice to do… I take care of me without feeling guilt… I meditate, relax, or take a walk and see it as productive time vs wasting time. I am aware of what I need, I am make sure I receive it.

Step TWO:  Throw a Girltalk… taking it deeper Event with Your Girlfriends

Use our super dooper fun conversation technology – Be Real. Be Wise. Be You. – guaranteed to get you closer to yourself and your girlfriends. To get the skinny on how to start a Girltalk group, and how to facilitate a fabu Girltalk gathering, see the Guide to Great Girltalking here.

GET CONNECTED (opening):  SHOW & TELL

Your goal here is to have each woman ‘check in’ on her personal experiment as a way to get the group connected, it’s a great primer for great girltalk!

1.    Each woman says her name and then answers this question: “One thing I love about about me is…”

2.   Go around the room until everyone has spoken. This will get you all connected enough to the conversation topic that you’ll be ready to Get Real!

BE REAL.

The goal? Get the truth on the table. Say what needs to be said, but too often isn’t. Use these questions to get the conversation started, or to change gears as the girltalk grows. Use all of them, use some of them, whatever works to get the conversation real. Ask women to think about what they learned through their personal experiment as fodder for the conversation.

1.   What do you think self-love really is?

2.   What has been the hardest gate for you? Why?

3.   Do you think that most women are hard on themselves? What is your Inner Mean Girl hardest on you about? What’s the impact?

4.   What does taking care of yourself really mean?

5.   Why do women find it so hard to take care of themselves? And how do we do it to ourselves, causing our own stress and overwhelm?

6.   What’s the biggest lie we tell ourselves about taking care of ourselves?

7.   What does that lie give us? What does It cost us? And what is the truth?

BE WISE.

Now it’s time to bring the wisdom forward so that you can start bringing forward thoughts and ideas that are going to help and inspire you to create the life you really want. I suggest using each of the 5 gates, and picking a few to discuss for each gate:

1.    What do you think is required to really love yourself in this gate? Tell us what it looks like. Tell us what it doesn’t.

2.   What stops you the most from having this love?

3.    What truth and wisdom do we not get until we are older that we could tell our daughters now so they could avoid some of the pain?

4.   What is the truth about how you self sabotage and what has worked to transform it into self love?

BE YOU. The DARE.

Now it’s time to take action, to do something out of your comfort zone that has the potential to make real shift in your life. And like a dare, it has to push your edges.

1.   Choose one gate to grow your self–love through or over. Make the commitment to the group and on paper.

2.    If you make this commitment, what are the promises you need to make to yourself. What must you say YES! to and what must you say NO! to.

3.    Express your commitment in your own unique way. Be witnessed in your gate and promises by delivering the commitment in front of others – dance, sing, or just talk. Just be brave and step forward.

Love is a practice. Start by practicing on you. Choose Self-Love this February 13^th. Visit www.madlyinlovewithme.com to get your free Self-Love Kit

Have a great time Girltalking and inspiring each other to love yourselves more!

With big heart,

Christine Arylo

Chief Girltalker

To learn more about Christine Arylo, creator of Girltalk… taking it deeper, inspirational catalyst and self love expert, visit her at www.daretoliveyou.com, a virtual cornucopia of self-love inspiration created just for you. JOIN the international self-love movement, MADLY IN LOVE WITH ME & download her free Madly in Love with ME Guide, full of daring and practical tips on how to fall more in love with you everyday, at www.MadlyinLoveWithMe.com.

Hello, girlfriends! As you embrace the holidays, be sure to take time for you, perhaps by hosting a Girltalk…Taking it Deeper gathering! Our topic for December/January is The Feminine Superpower of PAUSE. It’s a great opportunity to reflect on the year that’s been and claim the year to come. Instead of running into 2011,stop, reflect, give some real and wise thought to what just happened in 2010. PAUSE before moving forward with focus, intention and heart. To download this month’s PDF Discussion Guide, click here. For more information on Girltalk, click here.

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Be Real.

Every year, it’s the same old drill isn’t it? We start off with the best intentions, with gusto, resolved to reach our goals and make this ‘the’ year. But by February that gusto has been drained down by the overwhelm, pressure and realities of day-to-day life. Come October, we’re wondering where the year went, and not feeling quite as successful as we had hoped we would when the year started. And then without warning, it’s Thanksgiving, then December and a flurry of presents and parties. Before we know it Jan 1 has arrived, and with it the immense pressure to make this ‘the’ year. If you are a Type A person, you likely go into New Year’s resolution and goal setting >mode. If you are the Type B variety, you’re likely more relaxed and avoid serious goal setting, stepping into the new year with faith that it will all work out. The truth is that neither of these strategies work. Type A or Type B, these approaches are insane. They keep you doing the same thing year after year expecting different results, which by definition is insanity.

Be Wise.

This year instead of running through your holidays like an energizer bunny gone mad… not stopping to even think about all you experienced and accomplished in 2010, because by Jan 1 you feel pressured to figure out 2011… dare to take a pause! Dare to avoid the three biggest mistakes people make when approaching their new year, and instead take the wiser path. Which ones have you fallen into? And what is the deeper wisdom?
Mistake #1: Not stopping to reflect on the year that had passed. Going from one year into the next, without stopping to recognize all that had happened, is like living your life like a mountain climber, arriving at the mountain top of each year, but not stopping to take in the view that you worked so hard to achieve. Instead, you just take a quick breath, and keep pushing up the next mountain, the next year, without celebrating my successes or learning from your failures. No wonder you are exhausted. No surprise that you don’t feel like you really accomplished what you wanted, all you could see was the next mountain. Your Inner Wisdom Knows: In order to grow, we must stop, celebrate, reflect and learn at the end of every cycle.

Mistake #2: Not reflecting on 2010 or thinking about 2011 until Jan 1st rolls around. December is meant to be a time of slowing down and going inward, not running around like a maniac. People and presents good, mania not. Think about the bears. Do you see any of them dashing around trying to catch all the holiday sales? No, they are hibernating! While you can’t very well hibernate for the winter, you can slow your pace down. This will allow you to use December to contemplate, restore, and feel the gratitude of what you have received in 2010. The time period between Dec 21st and Dec 31 st is especially great for reflecting, and doing so helps you steer clear of all the crazy Jan 1st New Year’s Resolution energy people are stirring up because they realized that they’ve over indulged, overspent and under performed on their previous year’s expectations. Your Inner Wisdom Knows: Wise women start their year-end process before Jan 1.

Mistake #3: Pressuring yourself to have your entire year mapped out by the first week of January. While one week at the beginning of the year may seem reasonable, this approach fails to realize that you are working against nature. January is called the ‘dreaming time.’ It is called that because everything is frozen and still. And so should we be. It’s a time to be in the nothingness to allow our year to show itself, to dream of what it possible, to expand into everything that your heart and soul really want. It’s also a time for making your dreams crystal clear so that by February you are ready to plant the seeds and watch them grown throughout the year. That is a lot to do! So our process of setting our intentions is a month long for a reason…to give us that long to dream our new year. Don’t try to stuff 30 days into a week! Your Inner Wisdom Knows: January is for dreaming and setting the intentions of what you will seed and grow in the coming year. Take all of that time, and your dreams will unfold.

Mistake #4: Writing your goals with your head. Trained to think and live from our heads, trained to think dreams are fluffy puffy events that happen when we sleep, too often we write goals through the lens of what drives our career, bank account and fitness level forward. We focus on the achievements we believe will bring us success. What we fail to realize is that our understanding of success is extremely limited and that the real goal of success is only one thing: happiness. And happiness doesn’t come from our heads, it starts in our hearts, which is the place from which we would all be better served to write our goals from. Yes, our minds are extremely valuable but they are only tools to making our dreams realities. Your Inner Wisdom Knows: Goals must start with the dreams we have for ourselves, which can only be found in our heart.

Be You.

Each of these mistakes can be boiled down to one thing: the failure to understand the power of PAUSE. Most women have been trained to hit the GO GO GO button all their lives and while that may make you a very good achiever, it also makes you a very busy and exhausted woman who doesn’t always spend her energy, time and money on what was is important, and what truly has the power to accelerate your progress to your dreams… or bring you happiness on a daily basis. PAUSE is like a super power, when you activate it, PAUSE accelerates your ability to make your dreams realities because it provides you with something you can’t get when you are running through life as a frenzied, frazzled energizer bunny — PAUSE gives you wisdom. Alice Walker, Pulitzer prize winning author of the Color Purple said in a commencement address in 2002 , “Wisdom requires a pause… it is the pause that gives us clarity….” As 2010 ends and 2011 begins, I dare you and your friends to give yourself the gift of PAUSE by reflecting on 2010 in December (before Jan 1st) and to take the entire month of January to step forward in 2011 consciously, with intention and focus on what, where and how you want to spend your time, energy and money…to ultimately bring you the MOST happiness.

Step One:

REFLECT on the Year that’s Been & CLAIM a Mantra for the Year to Come

Take this adventure on your own, before getting together w/ your girlfriends.

Your Mission:

Gather all the wisdom from 2010 and state boldly what 2011 is all about for you. There are many different processes one can go through to PAUSE, reflect on the year that has been and vision, dream and create the one to come. Over the past 8 years, I’ve developed a process that I’ve used to take my clients and groups of women to reflect, expand, and focus so they can energize a creative vision for their year. I call the experience the Feminine Super Power of PAUSE and I’m sharing the first part of it with you here, as your adventure to take to end your 2010 with power.

REFLECT… the how: Your goal is to reflect on your year by looking at your:

1. Surprises – what happened that you didn’t expect. Can be happy or not so happy.

2. Successes – what you are proud of, accomplishments, yahoos!, milestones, little and big….everything counts here. Gush away. Brag away. Tell the world, and yourself, how great you are. And make it more than a boring list. Really put the feeling of celebration into it.

3. Failures – disappointments, struggles, things that didn’t work out as planned.

Some people have a problem with this word, but really failures give you the biggest learnings and there is tremendous freedom in admitting they happened. (p.s. this list should be shorter than your success list).

4. Learnings – what wisdom you have today that you didn’t last year. These are the gems you get to take with you into this new year and decade. It’s important to reflect exactly that order 1-4. To get the most of this reflection process, here are a few suggestions:

Set aside 1-2 hours by yourself, without distractions to reflect. No kids, TVs, radios or cell phones. Just you and your year. Start by doing a visualization review of your year. Close your eyes and take yourself back to the beginning of 2010. See yourself standing in January 2010. Who were you? What were you doing? What was true about your life? Then move to February and ask yourself the same questions. Play the movie of your 2010 month by month, asking these same three questions, and seeing and remembering what happened.

Get a journal or some blank pieces of paper. On the top of the page write the section name that you are reflecting on, for example, Surprises. Then “Free Flow Write” everything that comes to mind. Don’t stop or judge, just write. And when you feel like you have nothing left to write, stop, pause, remember, and write some more.

Go through all four sections. One by one. In the order laid out. Ask yourself at the end three questions….

1. “What do I want to leave behind?“

2. “What do I want to take with me?”

3. “Who am I stepping forward into this new year as? Who do I want to be?”

Step TWO: Throw a Girltalk… taking it deeper™ event with your girlfriends

Use our super-duper fun conversation technology – Be Real. Be Wise. Be You. – guaranteed to get you closer to yourself and your girlfriends. To get the skinny on how to start a Girltalk group, and how to facilitate a fabu Girltalk gathering, download the Girtalk… taking it deeper™ Getting Started Guide.

GET CONNECTED (opening): SHOW & TELL

Your goal here is to have each woman ‘check in’ on her personal experiment as a way to get the group connected, it’s a great primer for great girltalk!

Each woman says her name and then answers this question: “What I learned most about myself in 2010 was…”

Even if they didn’t do the experiment they should be able to answer. If some women brought a visual of their experiment, let them know they can show it now or whenever they want throughout the night.

Go around the room until everyone has spoken. This will get you all connected enough to the conversation topic that you’ll be ready to Get Real!

BE REAL.

The goal? Get the truth on the table. Say what needs to be said, but too often isn’t. Use these questions to get the conversation started, or to change gears as the girltalk grows. Use all of them, use some of them, whatever works to get the conversation real. Ask women to think about what they learned through their personal experiment as fodder for the conversation.

What were your biggest successes and failures in 2010?

What was easiest and hardest about doing this reflection process? What did you resist and what did you jump into?

If you gave 2010 a name, a mantra, like the “Year of XXX” what would you call it and why?

What about New Years Resolutions? Why don’t they work?

BE WISE

Now it’s time to bring the wisdom forward so that you can start bringing forward thoughts and ideas that are going to help and inspire you to create the life you really want.

Alice Walker says the wisdom is in the PAUSE. What did the pause give you? And how can we get more of it?

What is different about you today than at the start of 2010? How are you wiser?

What do you wish you knew at the beginning of this year that you figured out by the end?

What did you learn most about yourself by reflecting on your year?

BE YOU. The DARE.

Now it’s time to take action, to do something out of your comfort zone that has the potential to make real shift in your life. And like a dare, it has to push your edges.

Claim Your Year. If you gave 2011 a feminine power mantra, “The Year of XXXX,” what is it going to be?

Have a great time Girltalking and inspiring each other to have your best year yet!

With big heart,

Christine Arylo
Inspirational Catalyst and Chief Girltalker
Author of Choosing ME before WE

February. Self LOVE baby! In a month that is all about love, we’ll be getting real and wise about the fact that you have to love YOU before you can love anyone else. February 13th is the official day of self love. Mark it on your calendar! And visit www.madlyinlovewithme.com
to learn how you can participate. To learn more about Christine Arylo, creator of Girltalk… taking it deeper, inspirational catalyst and the “Queen of Self Love” visit her at www.daretoliveyou.com, a virtual cornucopia of self-love inspiration created just for you. JOIN the international self-love movement, MADLY IN LOVE WITH ME; download her free Madly in Love with ME Guide, full of daring and practical tips on how to fall more in love with you everyday, at www.MadlyinLoveWithMe.com.

Editor’s Note: This article previously appeared on GirlfriendCelebrations in 2008. All right, bargain huntresses, Black Friday (the day after Thanksgiving and biggest shopping day of the year, in case you’re not aware) is just around the corner. The wee morning hours, mobs of people, neverending lines, and aching feet: remember those from last year? Who wouldn’t need a drink after the race to that finish line? Since you are going to be out and about anyway, why not meet afterward for some girl time? It will give you the opportunity to show off your bargains, get some wrapping done and nourish your body, soul and mind with good food and company. Yes, GirlfriendCelebrations has planned a Black Friday party with you in mind! Read on for all the details, including some easy and fun connecting activities to help you and your girlfriends get the most out of your hours together.

Invitations

All right ladies, this is a no-brainer. Quick and to the point. Thanksgiving is on its way and we have no time to delay. Use evite or socializr for the quickest invite. You might say something like this:

Join the girls Black Friday

after your shopping is done

let’s get the gifts

all wrapped up

and have some fun.

Ask each girlfriend to pick up a few rolls of wrapping paper, tape, boxes or ribbons on their way through the checkout and bring them to the gathering. It is always better to have too many wrapping materials than too few. This will also help to reduce the cost of wrapping for each person. Plus, moms take note: it is always nice to wrap your kids’ gifts in paper that isn’t physically in your own house. Lest your five-year-old say, “Mommy, is Santa real? Because why would he use the same wrapping paper that is under your bed?” Lesson shared from my house to yours.

Setting

The house does not have to be spotless; everyone is busy with the holidays and should be very understanding. They will just be excited to hang out and put up their feet. Plan to use the room in your house with the biggest area to wrap gifts.

Set up a wrapping station. A large table donned with wrapping paper, scissors, bows, tape, gift tags, pens and 3×5 cards—all the accessories to make a girl’s wrapping complete. The cards can be used in lieu of gift tags –just tape to the bottom of their wrapped gift. This comes in handy for gifts from Santa. On the 3×5 card they can write what is inside and who it is for. Just be sure to tape the 3×5 card securely; it would be a shame to have to unwrap a gift just to find out what is inside and who it is for. Another lesson shared from my house to yours.

Food and Drink

Make it simple– order out! Just make sure to order from someone who delivers. Pizza is the perfect comfort food. Or Italian, Chinese—whatever you are in the mood for, just make sure you can call it in. You don’t want to have to stop on your way home; the day is too busy for that. Instead, let your fingers do the walking and you can do the talking—with your girlfriends.

While you’re shopping for Thanksgiving this week, just throw a few extra things in the cart. Some ideal quick munchies might include: Hummus and pita chips, pretzels and spicy mustard, pre-cut cheese and crackers, and carrots and veggie dip. Those are all things you can throw in a bowl and serve without having to think about it.

Some drink ideas to warm the soul: Hot cocoa with a side pour of schnapps, spiced eggnog or any holiday-spiced beer. Be sure to offer water as well. After all that running around, everyone is sure to need a little shot of H20.

Connecting Activities

A lot of wrapping and chatting will be done at this gathering, so the activities will be pretty minimal. But some quick suggestions might include:

Quizzing everyone after the wrapping is done. Write down the gifts that each girl is wrapping: What gift and to whom. Then afterwards, quiz the girls to see who was most observant. The one with the most correct answers wins.

Things to talk about. 1. How did you learn the truth about Santa and at what age? 2. What do you enjoy most about the holidays? 3. Are there any holiday traditions in your family that you feel are important to pass on? 4. If you could only remember one Christmas, which one would it be and why? 5. What is the most non-traditional thing you have adopted into your holidays?

Match the Santa list. Ask everyone to write down some of the things they asked Santa for as a child. The hostess will randomly read off the lists of each girlfriend’s childhood wants. Your gal pals try to match the guests with what they asked for. The one with the most correct answers wins.

Weirdest gift guess. Ask everyone to write down the weirdest gift ever received at the holidays. The hostess will read the answers randomly. The guests will try to match the weirdest gift with its receiver. The one with the most correct answers wins.

Prizes and party favors are not necessary for the games or this party. It will be enriching just to learn some things about the girls that you never knew. Learning more about each other enhances our girlfriend relationships. What better prize could a girl ask for?

We hope you take time to turn the race of Black Friday into something special, a winning finale to this busiest of all shopping days. Your girlfriends will be appreciative, even if the invite is last-minute. If you have any other Black Friday traditions with your girlfriends, we’d love to hear about them in the comment form below.

Unrated

Ever wondered if your actions alone could  make a difference in the fight against breast  cancer?  You—one single person in a world of 6  billion, helping to defeat a cancer that 1 out of  every 8 women is diagnosed with in her  lifetime. Sounds daunting at best. But with a few tricks up her sleeve and a dash of humor, Breast Cancer Warrior Brooke  Jones reminds us how simple it is for girlfriends everywhere to help in the defeat of breast cancer this Halloween season.

By Brooke Jones

Whether you go out ‘Trick or Treating’ or you stay home handing out ‘treats,’ this Halloween you can help make Breast Cancer HISTORY.

On Halloween, October 31, 2010 (which just happens to be the last day of Breast Cancer Awareness Month), in cities and suburbs; boulevards and businesses; condos and cubicles across America, Breast Cancer Warriors and their friends will go door-to-door, office-to-office and desk-to-desk using a new Halloween ‘mantra’: “Trick Or Treat To Help Defeat Breast Cancer“, and we’ll do it every Halloween until Breast Cancer is history.

All Halloween donations will be used by The Breast Cancer Warrior Foundation to remove the financial barriers that currently prevent thousands of Breast Cancer Warriors from participating in Breast Cancer Clinical Trials. The sooner all Breast Cancer Clinical Trials vacancies are consistently filled, the sooner the Breast Cancer CURE and PREVENTION will become available.

To guarantee that every donation made on Halloween ends up in the hands of The Breast Cancer Warrior Foundation, please make your donation with a check, not cash – not quarters; not dimes; not dollars – checks, made payable to: The Breast Cancer Warrior Foundation, in whatever amount you can afford. We know that these are difficult times, so we ask that you write a check for One Dollar; or Two Dollars; or Ten Dollars – or whatever amount you can afford. Write as many of those checks as your budget will allow. Place your checks next to your Halloween Candy Bowl and when Breast Cancer Warriors or their friends come to your door on Halloween give a check, knowing that your hard-earned money will end up in the hands of the Breast Cancer Warrior Foundation, and no one else.

We’ve created a special series of Breast Cancer Warrior ‘Trick or Treat To Help Defeat Breast Cancer’ shirts (T’shirts and sweatshirts). They fit men, women, children and even small four-legged family members. We’ve even designed Breast Cancer Warrior ‘Trick Or Treat To Help Defeat Breast Cancer’ Tote Bags, to help Trick or Treater’s collect donations. Get yours at our online store: The Breast Cancer Warrior Affirmation Outlet.

Wear your Breast Cancer Warrior ‘Trick or Treat To Help Defeat Breast Cancer’ shirt; knock on doors and say the powerful words: “Trick Or Treat To Help Defeat Breast Cancer”. The words are printed on the shirts and bags, so if you forget what to say, just look at what you’re wearing. (We Breast Cancer Warriors do occasionally forget things, don’t we?!)

Proceeds from the sale of Breast Cancer Warrior “Trick Or Treat To Help Defeat Breast Cancer” shirts and bags, as well as all Halloween donations, benefit The Breast Cancer Warrior Foundation.

Please join us this Halloween, in honor of Breast Cancer Warriors past and present, and help make Breast Cancer HISTORY.

Brooke Jones is a former stand-up comedian, Los Angeles radio personality and screenwriter. Now, in addition to fighting cancer, Brooke is the creator and editor-in-chief of BreastCancerWarrior.net — the internet’s unique breast cancer web Site, featuring crucial information, expert articles, links to the Internet’s most-respected breast cancer web sites, and …humor.

Continuing our Month of Friendship series, Shasta Nelson is an expert on new friendship: Her GirlFriendCircles website and introduction service is successfully matching women friends, in real life, across the country! She’s done a lot of thinking on both the art and the science of making friends. Below, she shares why making new friends is important at any life stage. Enjoy!

by Shasta Nelson

When I moved to San Francisco, I had an amazing circle of friends spread across the country but soon realized that as much as I loved Facebook and my iPhone—I certainly didn’t want all my relationships to be limited to them. I reached a point where I wanted to make new memories with friends, rather than the reporting of life or re-living of the past that we tend to do with “those we used to be close to.”

I needed present friends. I needed local friends. I needed new friends.

Normalize New Friends

Those are hard words to say though, for some reason. We have this stigma that to admit needing friends might somehow be misinterpreted as saying “No one likes me” or “I have no friends.” It taps into all our insecurities, fears and any shame we have over any relationship that didn’t last forever.

In fact, most friendships don’t last forever. Reported in September’s MORE magazine, Sally Koslow says that “the average person now replaces half her friends every seven years.” At first I gasped when I read that, and then I nodded in recognition.

The truth is that there are multiple times in our lives when we need to expand our circle of friends! Tons of times! Whether it’s a move, a break-up/divorce, a realization that all your friends have kids/are single/moved away, a change in jobs or decision to work from home, a life-changing experience, a new hobby, a shift in life focus when our kids move out or we retire…. The list could go on-and-on! None of those reasons are a judgment against us! They are simply stages of life that remind us that while a couple of our friendships might prevail through differences, the truth is that we all need to be constantly replenishing our circle of friends to ensure it’s meaningful for who we are now.

Need New Friends

There have been numerous reports linking a circle of supportive friends to lowering stress levels, increasing happiness, prevention of diseases, faster recovery rates for healing and greater chance of reaching life goals. Add to that the reports that relationships improve your odds of survival by 50 percent, and we have a serious reminder that our friendships are not a nice-to-have, but a necessity!

The research published in July in the journal PLoS Medicine, compared low social connectedness to have the same health impact as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, to being an alcoholic, as more harmful than not exercising and twice as harmful as obesity!

I’m not a big fan of telling people how many friends they need. We’re all different, but studies seem to suggest people are happiest with somewhere between 5-10 meaningful friendships. And other reports show that half of us have less than 2 people we’d call real friends. There seems to be some discrepancy between our experience and our ideal?

Note that there is a difference between how many people you’re friendly with versus how many people you call a friend. Huge difference. It’s common to assume we have lots of friends, but when we examine it we realize we simply know a lot of friendly people through work and school. An easy test for me is to ask myself “How many people would I feel comfortable asking for a ride to the airport?” or “Who is in my life that I could text last-minute to see if they were available to hang out without it feeling weird?” Easy things—we’re not even talking about taking care of your kids when they’re sick!

Invite New Friends

Recognizing who is in our circle and acknowledging if, and when, we need to invite more meaningful friendships into our lives is part of taking care of our wellbeing. I’ll be the first to admit, it was often more tempting to call an established friend and tell her about my need to go shopping than it was to call up a potential friend to see if she wanted to go shopping. In the beginning it was less meaningful to talk to a new friend than to call someone who already knew me, but I held the truth that, like dating, I simply had to put the consistent time into my new relationships to create those bonds.
It didn’t “just happen.” Friendships don’t just show up. Fun people might. But turning them into friendships simply is an investment we have to make.
And now, every Tuesday night, I have girls’ night with the same four women in San Francisco. I know who to call for a ride to the airport and who to text for a last-minute get together!

So, now, my passion is helping foster that process for everyone else! Do it for your health & happiness!

shasta

The Friendship Circle (a network of five organizations committed to celebrating the power of female friendships) is partnering in September for a Month of Friendship. Visit these Friendship Circle websites daily in September for more inspiration and information:

• The Friendship Blog – by psychologist, professor of psychiatry, and author, Dr. Irene S. Levine (The Friendship Doctor), author of Best Friends Forever: Surviving A Breakup with Your Best Friend. Follow Irene on Twitter.
• GirlfriendCelebrations – premier source of girls night ideas on the web. Founded by friends Dawn Williams Bertuca and Tina VanZant Bishop. Girlfriend Celebrations on Facebook and Twitter
• GirlFriendCircles.com - only online community that matches new friends offline by connecting circles of women in local areas, by Shasta Nelson. On Facebook and Twitter.
• Girlfriendology.com - online community for women based on inspiration, appreciation and celebration of female friendship. Created by Debba Haupert. On Facebook and Twitter.
• MWF Seeking BFF - chronicles the author’s search for a new best friend after moving to a new city for love, by Rachel Bertsche.

Often on GirlfriendCelebrations, we bring you ideas for combining girls night and charity. So we were delighted when Kimberly Wilson offered to share her very own “recipe” for a Charitea Soiree. Kimberly is a teacher, writer, do-gooder, entrepreneur, and eco-fashion designer. She is the creative director and founder of Tranquil Space, named among the top 25 yoga studios in the world by Travel + Leisure, author of Hip Tranquil Chick: A Guide to Life On and Off the Yoga Mat and Tranquilista: Mastering the Art of Enlightened Work and Mindful Play, and holds a Masters in Womens Studies. When not bookstore browsing, she can be found sipping tea, crafting new designs for TranquiliT, or leading retreats. Her work has been featured on Martha Stewart Living Radio as well as in Daily Candy, Fit Yoga, U.S. News and various books. With a passion for do-gooding, Kimberly launched Tranquil Space Foundation to bring yoga, creativity, and leadership to women and girls and is currently pursuing a Masters in Social Work.

by Kimberly Wilson

One way to raise awareness (and funds or goods) for your favorite cause is by throwing a flair-filled fete. Who doesn’t love parties? In my first book I touched on this concept and even created a downloadable tool kit to assist readers in bringing this idea to reality. Many good things start small and gain momentum through grassroots efforts. Good old-fashioned tea parties combined with activism can be a powerful and fun tool for change. A ChariTea soiree helps build community and is a great networking experience. Invite five to fifteen people and ask each to bring like-minded friends: Perfect for getting your name out there as the do-gooding “hostess with the mostess.”

Here’s the skinny: Hosting the soiree in your home allows you to create the complete vibe. If that isn’t possible, look around for a cozy local café that has the same ambience you want to create. Following is the time line for pulling this off seamlessly and tranquilly.

Timeline

Four Weeks Before
-Determine charity to highlight, and request promotional materials.
-Send invites to your fave gal pals and encourage them to bring two to three friends.
-Invite a guest speaker from the charity.

One Week Before
-Send reminder and directions.
-Buy dry goods: drinks, treats, and candles, plus assorted teacups, saucers, and cloth cocktail napkins from your local thrift store.
-Purchase goodie bags and their contents: a box of organic fair trade tea, organic fair trade chocolate, scented tea lights, bath treats, promotional materials from charity, tissue paper.

One or Two Days Before
-Buy fresh food.
-Create a playlist to set the mood (suggested: Madeleine Peyroux or John Coltrane).
-Buy flowers.
-Put together goodie bags.

Day of Event
-Tidy your surroundings.
-Prepare food.
-Set mood: light candles, arrange flowers, play the perfect music for your vibe.
-Set up a treat and libation station.
-Indulge in a restorative yoga pose prior to guests’ arrival.
-Don your most fabulous and comfy ensemble.

At Soiree
-Be the hostess with the mostess: Greet and introduce guests warmly, keep drinks and laughter flowing.
-Introduce speaker from charity.

Day After Event
Send thank-you notes to guests, speakers, and helpers via snail mail.

Tea and Tasty Treats

Here’s my suggested menu:

-Cucumber-mint and goat cheese-watercress tea sandwiches
-Lemon cream scones
-Cookies (butter and/or ginger are lovely tea accents)
-Fresh fruit selection (assorted berries, green apples, pears)
-Tea selection

About tea brewing: An intoxicating brew of tea is essential. Begin with fresh, cold water, and heat it in a kettle on the stove. Prewarm the teapot by rinsing with hot water; a ceramic teapot provides the best heat and flavor. Measure one heaping teaspoon of loose-leaf tea per cup and add to the teapot. If using tea bags, count on one bag for each teacup. Remove the kettle from the heat when it has reached the just-boiling point, and pour immediately into the teapot. Cover the pot with a lid, and brew the tea for three to five minutes before pouring. The larger the tea leaves, the longer the brewing time. Remove the leaves or bags from the brewed tea to prevent bitterness. Serve with raw sugar, honey, or agave nectar. Serve a variety of fair trade and organic green, white, and herbal teas, from chamomile to jasmine to chai. The Republic of Tea, Tulsi Tea, and Gypsy Tea have a plethora of tasty organic options.
—
Kimberly lives in a petite pink palace in Washington, D.C. with two fancy felines named after French impressionists, a supportive beau, and a sassy black pug. Indulge in musings on tranquilology through her blog and podcast, Tranquility du Jour. Learn more at kimberlywilson.com. For more ideas on divine do-gooding and entertaining with style, pick up a copy of Kimberly Wilson’s book, Tranquilista.

]]> http://www.girlfriendcelebrations.com/celebration-ideas/throw-a-charitea-soiree-for-your-next-girls-night-in/feed/ 2 http://www.girlfriendcelebrations.com/celebration-ideas/help-whip-cancer-with-the-pampered-chef-giveaway/ http://www.girlfriendcelebrations.com/celebration-ideas/help-whip-cancer-with-the-pampered-chef-giveaway/#comments Tue, 04 May 2010 12:08:43 +0000 Dawn http://www.girlfriendcelebrations.com/?p=1318

Finding a cure for breast cancer in our lifetimes is a cause that GirlfriendCelebrations is proud to support. So, we are thrilled to tell you about The Pampered Chef’s efforts to raise funds for breast cancer education and early detection programs through its “Help Whip Cancer” campaign. There’s no better feeling than gathering your girlfriends for a girls night that contributes to a great cause. Our girlfriends at the Pampered Chef have given us a delicious *pink* recipe you can use at your next girls night in, plus a martini glass giveaway you’re going to love!

Since introducing the Help Whip Cancer campaign in 2000, The Pampered Chef has raised more than $7.9 million to support breast cancer programs through the American Cancer Society.  Last year, the campaign raised more than $875,000 from Help Whip Cancer Fundraiser Shows and special pink-themed product sales.

“Almost everyone knows someone, whether it be a mother, sister or friend who has been affected by breast cancer,” says Marla Gottschalk, chief executive officer of The Pampered Chef. “The goal of this campaign is not only to raise awareness and education for breast cancer, it’s also about supporting women who have been affected by this disease.” There are two ways YOU can help:

1. Raise Funds with a Cooking Show Fundraiser

This May, in honor of Mother’s Day, The Pampered Chef invites people to celebrate the women in their lives by hosting a Help Whip Cancer Fundraiser Cooking Show. Up to 25 percent of total Help Whip Cancer Fundraiser Show sales will be contributed to the American Cancer Society for breast cancer awareness and early detection programs. If you don’t already have a Pampered Chef Consultant, find one HERE.

2. Buy Special Pink-themed Products

A contribution of $1 will go to the American Cancer Society for every pink-themed product purchased from The Pampered Chef between May 1-31, 2010. The following special Help Whip Cancer products apply: Pink & White Dots Martini Glasses  (shown below); Pink Color-Coated Tomato Knife; Pink & White Twixit! Clip Combo Pack; Sweet Honey Vanilla Sprinkle; Help Whip Cancer Reusable Shopping Bags. Guests who spend $60 or more in May get Help Whip Cancer® Reusable Shopping Bags (a set of two) for free, and they are also available for purchase. See all the Whip Cancer products HERE. We are so ready to buy that pink tomato knife! These products are available for purchase online as well as at cooking shows.

“Through Pampered Chef Fundraisers and pink product purchases, people can help the American Cancer Society save lives by raising funds and awareness for breast cancer this May,” says Scott Bennett, national vice president of marketing for the American Cancer Society.  “With the continued efforts of The Pampered Chef, we are getting closer to a world with less breast cancer and more birthdays.”

Heavenly Lemon Angel Cake

The lovely pink cake pictured above would make a great addition to your next girlfriend gathering or Little Pink Party to honor a friend with breast cancer. Here’s how to make it:

5 drops red food coloring

1 pkg (16 oz or 430 g) angel food cake mix

3 lemons

2 cups (500 mL) powdered sugar

2 cups (500 mL) thawed frozen fat-free whipped topping

1 pkg (10 oz) frozen raspberries in syrup, thawed

1 Preheat oven to 350°F (180°C). For cake, add food coloring to amount of water specified on package. Prepare cake according to package directions. Pour batter into Rectangular Baker. Bake on center rack 35-40 minutes or until top is golden brown, cracked

and center is slightly sunken. (Do not under bake.) Remove baker from oven; invert onto Stackable Cooling Rack. Without removing baker, let stand until completely cool (about 1½ hours).

2 Poke holes in cake about 1½ in. (4 cm) deep and ½ in. (1 cm) apart with large fork. Zest lemons using Zester/Scorer to measure 1 tbsp (15 mL) zest. Juice lemons using Juicer to measure 1∕3 cup (75 mL) juice. In Small Batter Bowl, combine sugar, juice and zest; whisk until smooth. Pour glaze over cake, spreading evenly. Let stand 30 minutes or until glaze is set.

3 Attach open star tip to Easy Accent® Decorator; fill with whipped topping. Garnish each serving with whipped topping; top with raspberries.

Yield: 15 servings

U.S. Nutrients per serving: Calories 220, Total Fat 0 g, Saturated Fat 0 g, Cholesterol 0 mg, Carbohydrate 52 g, Protein 3 g, Sodium 300 mg, Fiber 1 g U.S. Diabetic exchanges per serving: 2½ fruit, 1 starch (3½ carb)

Now for the Giveaway

OK, girlfriends, here’s how to enter to win those gorgeous pink dot martini glasses. These fun, polka-dotted glasses are perfect for get-togethers with girlfriends, a romantic dinner, baby showers or bridal showers. Use them to serve everything from drinks to desserts! Wouldn’t they look great at your next girls night? Here’s what to do:

1.Head on over to the Pampered Chef website and check out the Whip Cancer products.

2. Come back here and leave a comment stating which Whip Cancer product is your favorite and why.

3. For extra entries, tweet about this contest using the following:

I want to win some Pampered Chef pink dot martini glasses! http://bit.ly/pcgcga #whipcancer #girlfriendcelebrations

Please note: You must use the #girlfriendcelebrations hashtag AND the link for your tweet to count as an entry.

One extra entry per day is allowed. U.S. shipping address only, please. We’ll keep the contest open until 11:59 p.m. on Wednesday, May 12. Winner will be drawn at random from all qualifying entries. Good luck, girlfriends!

Glorious Spring is here—the perfect opportunity to get the girls out into the garden! Gardening offers the opportunity to relieve stress and connect to nature while growing healthy food or nurturing beautiful blooms. Green thumb or not, here are some quick ideas for gardening-themed girlfriend get-togethers and activities.

Plant a group garden. Many towns have community garden plots that can be rented. Why not rent one with your girlfriends and meet weekly to garden together? It’s a built-in weekly date and everyone can share in the harvest. Or, if one girlfriend has the space for a large garden but doesn’t want to do all the work herself, she can offer the space for the group plot.

Have a “planting bee.” Many hands make light work, so bring your hands and your garden gloves to your girlfriend’s house and help get her spring planting done. Then, load up the wheelbarrow and move on to the next girlfriend’s house, and so on until everyone’s got some spring color in her yard. Be sure to have pitchers of lemonade, iced tea, and water on hand.

Learn a little. Ask a local garden club or landscaping professional to speak at your next girls night about the best new plants for your area, how to use a rain barrel, or another topic that interests you.

Share the bounty. Donate some or all of the harvest from your group garden (above) to a food pantry or to local churches who have needy families. See Plant a Row for the Hungry for tips on how to make this happen successfully.

Seed small spaces. Apartment dwellers, don’t despair! You can still enjoy all the benefits of gardening get-togethers through container gardens or square-foot gardening. Invite the girls over to lend their labor and design skills to help fill your containers (just be sure to tempt them with tasty nibbles and libations!) If you’re a gardening novice, try P. Allen Smith’s Container Gardens: 60 Container Recipes to Accent Your Garden for “plant recipes” that tell you exactly how to create beautiful container gardens.

What about party favors? Try gifting your girlfriends with seed packets, hot pink garden gloves (every time she wears them, she’ll think of you), small annuals or perennials to pot, or miniature rosebushes (yellow roses signify friendship). All are inexpensive choices that will remind your girlfriends, all summer long, that your friendship blooms brightly!

Have any great gardening resources we should know about? Share them in the comments!

While book clubs seem all the rage these days, gathering with the girls to discuss books leaves little room for a girl to express her creative side. Why not change up your next girls night in with a hip and soulful poetry party? With inspiration from National Poetry Month, Girlfriend Celebrations has created a party plan for girlfriends like you looking for a fresh, expressive outlet. A poetry jam for women who want a creative slice of life or an alternative to the humdrum girls night. Yes, you can create this party with poetic ease, even if you’re feeling at a loss for words.  So go ahead, get your guest list together and plan away with us.

Invitations

A pretty paper invitation makes a beautiful statement, especially if the verse is handwritten. Any personalized invitation with the host’s own penned rhyme always make the request seem a little more special. However, in this digital age, not all girlfriends like to take time to send the written word. So if that’s the case or you are short on time, try using MyPunchbowl. For invitation wording, we’ve provided an example below:

Join me for some

poetry and  rhyme

a charming girls night out

without spending a dime,

Sharing reverie in lines

is sure to be an awesome time

even if your tongue is tied

never fear, my dear

catty words are not spoken here.

April 27, 2010

7 pm

Be there or be square!

Setting and Setup

Give your guests the intimate coffee house feel with plenty of seats and a staging area. If you have enough room, set up little tables with chairs or stools. An ottoman and scattered floor cushions can create a cozy touch. Set aside an area for reading your pieces. This can easily be done by draping a sheet or curtains on the wall as a backdrop. You can even create a stage with shipping pallets covered in fabric.

With guests coming to share a poetic piece, decide ahead of time if you want guests to write their own or if it’s okay to simply bring one to read. If you’re looking for a little more structure, ask each guest to create their poem around a set theme. The theme can be spunky, funny, playful, serious or whatever the girls in your crowd can relate to. Some ideas might include:  dating, dislikes, mom, first loves, exes, vacation, lipstick, sex or lack of, best friend, family and friendship.  Whatever decisions you make, be sure to include it in your invitation. Letting your guests know what to expect, will dash uncertainty and the embarrassed feeling of not being prepared. The ultimate goal for you and your guests is to share in the moment with no pressure but with the willingness to open up. And just in case a guest still shows up empty-handed, make sure you have a few published poems on hand, just in case. Poets.org is a online resource to check.

Food and Drink

Serve coffee shop confections, such as cranberry scones, oatmeal raisin cookies, and chocolate mini muffins. Set out a bevy of toppings, mini chocolate chips, fresh fruit, granola, and nuts for a yogurt parfait bar. Be sure to have a garnished pitcher of lemonade and bottles of sparkling water on hand for thirsty guests. To get things rocking, deliver a round of Starbucks Lattetini’s to your guests.

Connecting Activities

Create a group poem. Write the first line of a poem, then pass it around to each of the guests to add a line.  As the poem is being passed, fold the paper so that only the last line is visible to the next person. It will be amusing to see what the group comes up with.  For a twist, start the same line on different sides of the room and ask the guests to pass it to someone they choose.  It will be interesting to see how two different poems with the same beginning ended.

Create a group challenge. Separate the group into two teams.  Each team will have five minutes to create a poem with a pre-selected theme. With a set number of rounds, mix up the challenge to have a funny theme followed by a serious one.  Working together as a team is  a fabulous way for your girlfriends to get to know one another.

Create word verses. Cut out words from magazines, newspapers, fliers, etc.  Ask each guest to select ten of the words. After the word selection give each guest a pretty piece of stationery and a stick of glue to create their own word poem. Set a rule that they may add five written words to their poem. This is a great activity to spark imagination since you can only use the words that have been given to you.

Party Favors

If you are creating a monthly poetry club in lieu of a book club, don’t bother with favors.  However, if it’s just another eclectic girls night out, here are a few options:

For the do-it-yourself creative-types, buy blank mini notebooks and pens.  Embellish them with stamps, ribbon, unique artwork or even words. A personalized favor is a fabulous way for your guests to feel appreciated.

A mini journal for your guests to write in is a thoughtful gift and has a myriad of uses (even if you don’t write poems).  Tell your friends how much they mean to you with a “Girlfriends make life better” journal. Look at sites like Etsy or wedding favor websites for other great girlfriend party favors. If you take the time to look, there is something for everyone’s budget.

We’d love to hear how you’ve made your girls night out noteworthy. Drop us a line, even a comment or two, because the girlfriends always love to hear from you. And, be sure to sign up for our monthly newsletter filled with the latest girlfriend goings-on.

Rachael Ray was on the cover of USA Weekend last week with party plans to celebrate spring. We love Rachael’s practical approach to entertaining, and in a lot of ways, her philosophy mirrors ours (even though we’re much more likely than she is to let Trader Joe’s do the cooking). Just like GirlfriendCelebrations, Rachael emphasizes keeping your get-togethers “easy, cost-effective, casual and fun.” Here are some of her tips that we especially agree with:

Invite by email, text or phone. Perfectionist expectations are the reason many girlfriends never invite friends over. While beautiful, cute, or inventive invitations are fun to have, they are not a deal-breaker. Do like Rachael and “just tell people to come over.”

Entertain earlier in the day. Having friends over for breakfast, brunch or lunch can be much cheaper than throwing  a dinner party. Plus, it’s refreshingly different!

Offer a signature cocktail. Mixing a big batch of just one cocktail is easier and cheaper than stocking a full bar—plus, it makes your party more special. We served up Pink Perfection cocktails at our e.l.f. Makeup Party and they were a big hit. We literally whipped them up without a recipe using vodka, strawberry lemonade (from Trader Joe’s), Sprite or club soda, and fresh strawberries.

Customize your playlist. Using music and your ipod, you can create a mood from “dance all night” to spa-like relaxation. It costs next to nothing, and you can even burn CDs for your girlfriends to take home as party favors. To get you started, see the Ultimate Girls Night Playlist created by our readers!

Here’s to a spring full of impromptu, fun, budget-friendly girlfriend get-togethers! For more great tips on food and more, check out the entire Rachel Ray USA Weekend article here.